7 most seductive things to say to her on a first date.
On a first date, it might be difficult to choose what to talk about with a female and what to say to keep the conversation going. After all, the first date is usually an exercise in a careful balance of the two parties.
On the one hand, you need to give the impression that you are engaged, engaging, and flirty enough so that she realizes the two of you are going out on a date and not simply hanging out as friends.
On the other hand, you don’t want to be too forward with her and give the impression that your main goal is to have sexual relations with her.
Because of this, it is more crucial than ever before to have a good idea of what to talk about on a first date.
It is not always simple, of course, particularly when nerves come into play and the two of you who are trying to develop a romantic relationship have trouble finding your footing in the talk.
But in order to assist you in saying all of the appropriate things that land squarely in that sweet spot, we contacted a number of the most prominent relationship and dating experts in order to compile a list of all of the wonderful one-liners that you can keep in your back pocket in order to keep the conversation exactly where it should be: on the right track.
Before you start, I have one piece of advice for you that has nothing to do with what you say: the longer you two chat, the better it will be.
According to the findings of research conducted at Stanford University, the more time that passes during the talk on a first date, the less importance the possible partner places on superficial factors such as height and appearance.
You have a good chance of getting a second date if you know how to play your cards well and if you say the appropriate things on the first date. And in the same vein, you could also give one of the women one of the 20 compliments that they can’t resist.
The top conversation topics for a first outing together
“You look really stunning in that outfit.”
It is imperative that you convey to your date right away that you find her attractive if you are experiencing chemistry between the two of you. According to Rhonda Milrad, LCSW, Founder and Chief Relationship Advisor of the app RelationUp, not only do women want to feel sexually attracted to their date, but they also want to feel that their date is sexually attracted to them.
“Not only do women want to feel sexually attracted to their date, but they also want to feel that their date is sexually attracted to them,” says Milrad.
“In point of fact, when a woman experiences the latter, she is more likely to experience attraction in return. Therefore, congratulate her.
However, how? According to Milrad, the reason why this particular statement is so successful is that it is flattering without being creepy, and the inclusion of the term “on you” makes it more specific than a line that just states, “you’re so gorgeous.”
Keep in mind that praises that are too general come seem as disingenuous. If you are interested in dating someone who works with you, there is an additional set of guidelines you should be aware of.
“Don’t be concerned. I’ll go back to them at a later time.”
According to the findings of the annual Singles in America research conducted by Match.com, the usage of cell phones is a key sticking point for many daters. According to the findings of the study, 75 percent of singles find it unattractive when someone on a date answers their phone.
In addition to this, 66% of respondents said that they did not like it when their date stopped them to answer to a text message, and 41% believe that it is just plain unpleasant to have your phone face-up on the table during a date.
It is a good idea to put your phone in your jacket and pretend that it is not there for the whole of the date; that is, up until the point when you check your calendar to arrange the next one, at which point you should take it out. Oh, and just so you know, it may be in your best interest to update your phone.
The poll conducted by Match.com also discovered that women are more inclined to assess you badly if you have an outdated or older model mobile phone. This percentage was determined to be 92%.
Have you heard what the President had to say the other day?
Dan Ariely, a behavioral economist and professor at Duke, did research that indicated that asking extremely contentious questions such, “How do you feel about abortion?”
In the end, the inquiry “Have you ever broken someone’s heart?” led to more meaningful, fascinating, and attraction-producing talks than the standard queries about hobbies, family, and job.
Naturally, those traditional date themes are vital; nevertheless, asking a question that requires emotional contemplation and openness about values builds a degree of trust that is crucial for a deeper level of attraction between the two people.
“I see what you’re getting at. That makes me go back to the day when…”
The aforementioned research from Stanford indicated that women, in particular, felt a connection with the males who interrupted them; but, not in the manner that you are probably thinking it to be.
To be quite clear, it is not appealing to cut someone off in order to dominate the discussion.
According to the findings of this study, however, good dates featured conversations in which the male skillfully stopped the lady to say something that demonstrated they had a common experience.
For instance, if the woman were to say something like, “I saw Radiohead last summer, and they were amazing,” and the man interrupted her to say, “I’m so jealous—Radiohead is one of my favorite bands, too,” before allowing the woman to continue, this would be an ideal exchange.
The woman could then go on to say something else. To put it another way, interruptions may be beneficial so long as they are used to demonstrate that you are paying attention to what is being said.
“Children are absolutely in my future,” or “Marriage is really vital to me.”
Having the confidence to go for what you want is undeniably an appealing attribute. Being in touch with who you are and the goals that you have is also very important. Milrad offers the following piece of advice: “Don’t be afraid to lay out what you’re up for.”
It’s possible that she might be interested in something light and fun if that’s what you want. Do not be hesitant to tell her that you are planning to have a family in the near future.
It is always beneficial to share in order to develop a closer connection with the other person and make sure that you are both operating from the same playbook. At the long run, if you are clear and direct in the beginning, you will save yourself a lot of time and effort, as Milrad points out.
“One of my favorite things to do on a Sunday morning is…”
Gretchen Kubacky, Psy.D., a psychologist based in Los Angeles, says that “the more a guy can build a picture of his life that includes the woman, the more likely it is that she will be interested.” “The more a guy can build a picture of his life that includes the woman, the more likely it is that she will be interested.”
For instance, stating that you like being physically active is not intriguing. However, if you tell her something along the lines of, “I love to wake up on a Sunday morning, grab some coffee and a croissant at my favorite coffee spot, and then head down to the beach with my surfboard and hit the waves,” she will have a much better understanding of what you are trying to convey.
Then, after that, you should follow up with a question such as, “Do you surf? If you don’t already know it, I’d be happy to teach you. It’s a lot of joy to do.” In this approach, your date will be able to determine whether or not the things you like doing seem fascinating to her.
Statements such as these, as noted by Kubacky, are an invitation to further dialogues, which, as she puts it, “starts forming a more comprehensive and enticing image of what your life together may look like.” being able to see what the two of your futures may look like when they are combined? Completely seductive.
“I place a high priority on spending time with my family.”
According to Paul DePompo, PsyD, a psychologist located in Newport Beach, a solid connection with your family—or even with your close friends—is absolutely something you want to show off on a first date.
“If you have strong connections with your family and friends, it gives proof that you are capable of the reciprocity that is required for a successful partnership,” he continues. “A healthy relationship requires two people who are capable of giving and receiving love.”
In a nutshell, it serves as another piece of evidence that you are a compassionate someone who is capable of maintaining connections that are significant and important over time. This is going to be a great benefit for the vast majority of women.
“It also conveys a message that you know how to manage your life and that you are capable of having appropriate limits,” argues DePompo. “This is a message that you want to communicate to others.”
A word of caution: make sure you don’t go too far while talking about your mother or any other unpleasant family turmoil you’ve gone through. The first one should be avoided at all costs, while the second one should be put off until a later time when you know each other better.
“I am grateful.”
Simple, but true.
According to Kubacky, demonstrating that you are courteous and kind is not only a significant turn on for most women seeking for their spouse, but it is also a must for most of these women.
Your generosity shouldn’t be reserved alone for her to enjoy. Be polite to everyone you come into contact with on the date, including restaurant staff, valet attendants, bartenders, and anybody else.
You may prove that you’re a stand-up man, which is, wait for it, sexually attractive by demonstrating that you feel all individuals are deserving of respect.
“I enjoy trekking, too. We ought to undertake that activity together at some point.
Getting invited out on a second date when the moment is perfect is definitely a lovely thing to happen. According to Pompeo, “it is best to wait until a high point in the evening and once you have found some similar interests or values, explain how you would like to share that experience with them.” This advice applies to the majority of people.
“For most people, it is best to wait until a high point in the evening.” This demonstrates that you are really interested in taking the relationship to the next level, which will increase the likelihood that she will agree to go on future dates with you.
Last but not least, DePompo recommends that you “do not wait until the conclusion of the date out of jitters; that’s too cliché.”
“I won’t be available on Friday, but I’m wondering if you have any plans for Saturday.”
This creates the impression that you are very busy and that people are eager to work with you.
According to Pompeo, “Perhaps this is an example of supply-and-demand at work, but people feel special when they realize that your time is important, but you are making them one of your priorities,” which is a phrase that can be found in the previous sentence.
And although being mysterious might be alluring, you definitely don’t want to be a jerk.
Make it clear to her that you are aware that the key to a healthy relationship is spending quality time together, and that you are aware of this despite the fact that you have a number of responsibilities that are highly valued and essential.