What Can I Do To Reunite With My Boyfriend?
Having been together for a year and a half, my boyfriend ended things with me two weeks ago. Spending time together has always been a source of contention in our relationship from the beginning. Sporting activities such as cycling, jogging, and competitive events are some of his favorite ways to spend his weekends.
When it came to spending time with me on weekends, he never actually made arrangements; instead, I was usually the one to make the first move, which annoyed me and made me feel uncomfortable about his desire to spend time with me.
I never anticipated him to give up his outdoor hobbies in favor of just include me in some of his weekend activities, but that is exactly what happened. Even though we didn’t see one other much during the week, he was an attentive boyfriend in every other manner, and I had no doubts about his feelings for me.
We had a conversation about spending more weekends together and making plans for the weekends a few months ago, the week before my birthday. He agreed and said that we should consider taking a weekend trip to celebrate my birthday, which I thought was a lovely idea.
As we spoke on the phone later that evening about his plans for the weekend of my birthday, he stated that he had made a reservation for a cycling ride for that weekend.
Because he had said that we were planning to travel away for my birthday, I was devastated. As a result, we had a major argument and were on the verge of breaking up. We came to an agreement and agreed to go away the next weekend, which I was pleased with, and he said that he would make a greater effort to do things with me on weekends in general, which I was pleased with as well as his statement.
He stated in passing that he had planned to spend roughly five weekends of the summer doing outdoor things a month later, while we were chatting about summer plans.
My involvement in the preparations would have taken up most of the summer; I was devastated after all of our chats and couldn’t speak to him for a few days after that. We finally met, and there was a lot of tension between us. He asked me what was wrong, and I told him about the weekend stuff that had occurred.
I went on about how I was tired of having the same discussion and that I didn’t know if we would ever be able to strike a balance where we would both be happy. I was so irritated that I maybe went on a little too long and was perhaps a little unfair and harsh in my tone and language.
The only thing he said was that things weren’t that horrible and that I wasn’t a particularly bad boyfriend, which I wasn’t at the time. He didn’t say anything to me the following morning, and when I attempted to contact him to chat to him that evening, his phone was not in service at all.
I received a call from him the next day, informing me that he had decided to end the relationship and that he was under no need to provide an explanation. He also said that he would return my belongings the following day. After asking how long he had been thinking about it, he said that it had just been the previous two days.
I was surprised by his response. He came to my house the following day with all of my belongings and stated he didn’t owe me an explanation since he was completely insane.
A couple of things struck me while I spoke with him: that I didn’t consider him to be a poor partner, and that all I wanted was to spend more time with him. He just said that he thought I had forced him to end the relationship and that he felt that no matter what he did, it never made me happy. He also stated that he wanted space and that was the end of it.
His treatment of me was so cold, brutal, and decisive about everything, yet he is a wonderful person, so it was difficult to accept that he could treat me in such a cruel and conclusive manner.
Our communication has ceased, and I sent him a letter only to express my regret for how I treated him the night before we broke up, knowing well well that I had been unfair, but received no answer. My feelings for him were intense and I hoped that we might come to an agreement on our differences. Is there any ray of hope in sight for us? So, what can I do to get my guy back in my life.
Good day, Jane. Thank you for your message.
True love is the only thing that can hold a relationship together; everything else is only a temporary solution. In the absence of pure love, every tiny or significant disagreement might result in a final breakup, but when love is true, no matter how many breakups are started, the pair always manages to get back together.
Even in the most loving of relationships, there can be miscommunications and disagreements, but the ultimate line is how real is the love that exists in both your hearts? It is impossible to have one-sided love.
Put another way, if your boyfriend genuinely cares about you, he would reach out to you and try to repair the damage done by their breakup. If he does not, it just confirms what you already know: his love was “never sincere” in the first place.
Unfortunately or thankfully, what comes through in your description is that the breakup is irreversible. That he returned your belongings to your residence is evidence of this..
One of those “self-loving” males who wants to feel that just by existing in a relationship with someone, they are fulfilling a responsibility to that person. As well as this, he is the sort of person that does not need or want a romantic connection. If he is alone or in another one-sided relationship with another women, he will be quite content.
To be quite honest, individuals like him typically have no concept of what “love” is all about; for them, a relationship is merely a “obligation” or a “formality.” The reason for this is that he is “self supported” and “self contained” as well as “self joyful,” and so does not need a connection in the same way that you do.
Although you played a little role in his life, he is content with his outdoor activities and interests; on the other hand, you played a significant role in his life, and he played a minor one in yours (may be the central part in your life). However, he did not share your feelings for him, despite your efforts.
Regarding personal relationships, it is critical to comprehend what the word “love” signifies. In partnerships, love is defined as “needing” the other person or “wanting” the other person’s presence in your life because they make you feel happy, loved, or whole, respectively.
Having said that, love is not synonymous with “neediness.” Rather, it is just an emotional attachment to the other person in which you get connected to the other person’s existence in your life.
Relations are the spice of life, and love is one of the most exquisite feelings (if you can call it an emotion at all) that a human being can ever feel. Yes, love does include a significant amount of “neediness,” and it is this neediness that helps to keep the relationship going in the beginning.
What’s the purpose of being in a relationship if you don’t “need” the other person in your life? It is possible for a relationship to endure forever if both parties are “requiring” each other; but, when they cease needing each other (even if just one of them quits needing), the relationship ends.
As far as human relationships are concerned, genuine love equates to “true needing.” In order to experience “unconditional” or “detached” love, one must first attain the status of “Buddha.”
