DO YOU FEEL BETTER AFTER GETTING Revenge?
It is only normal to feel the desire to punish someone who has injured or betrayed you, especially if you feel they deserved it. It’s been said that you should give an eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth, but does getting even really make you feel better?
When you are wronged or betrayed by another person, you may have feelings of wanting to get even with them by inflicting pain or suffering on them. The question is, however, whether or not pursuing retribution would genuinely help you feel better.
It’s human nature to crave revenge when we’ve been wronged, especially if we feel like we have no other option. Many individuals experience the stirrings of revenge at some point in their lives, although not everyone will act on those desires. Is it genuinely going to help you feel better to get back at the person who has wronged you, or are there other, healthier ways to react to being wrong?
HURT PEOPLE HURT PEOPLE
When you’ve been wronged, your first instinct may be to seek revenge by lashing out at the person who did you wrong. It’s a defense system that kicks in when we’re very young and aids in the maintenance of our personal boundaries, and it’s responsible for developing itself. It’s possible that the urge to teach the other person a lesson is what drives this inclination at times, but more often than not, it’s just an effort to improve how you feel about yourself.
Whoever injured you was probably also going through a difficult time when they did it to you. Even if you weren’t the one who first hurt them, at some time they did get wounds, and it’s possible that those wounds were caused by you. It may have been a parent or an earlier lover, but regardless of who was responsible, the wound has not healed completely. Their suffering is then communicated to you via the manner in which they interact with you.
If you are aware of this, it may assist you in seeing the one who has wronged you with compassion, which may result in a reduction in the need for retribution. You will be the more mature person in the situation if you are able to resist the temptation to inflict further harm on them. This will prevent you from stooping to a similar level. You are now in a better position to protect yourself against any further efforts to harm you as a result of this development.
REVERSE IS A DISH THAT IS At Its Finest
When Presented Chilled To The Served
It is simple for feelings of love to morph into feelings of hatred when we are emotionally invested in another person. However, they are only two faces of the same coin to look at. You are still involved in an emotional connection with the person who betrayed you, and the fires of your desire are still burning brightly.
When you feel betrayed and are concerned about how to get even with them, you are still emotionally connected to them. Even if the other person is no longer a part of it, as long as you are in this frame of mind, they still have the ability to have an impact on your life and the relationships that you will have in the future.
Indifference is the antithesis of love. Love is unconditional. You will recover more quickly if you are able to let go of the past and go on with your life, and you can let the other person deal with the repercussions of the acts they took on their own. Don’t give them a free apartment to dwell in your brain or give them the power to harm your capacity to love and trust in the future.
BOUNDARIES
People desire retribution for a variety of reasons, one of which is to demonstrate to the offender that they are not permitted to treat them in a certain manner. They believe that the only way the person will learn is for them to feel the same anguish as them, but in reality, all it does is keep the misery alive for both of you.
If a guy has an affair and his wife retaliates by having an affair herself, then the odds are that the relationship will end brutally because they will both lose faith in each other and respect for themselves.
If, on the other hand, she made it abundantly apparent to him that monogamy was something she held in the highest regard and that she had firm personal boundaries, it is quite likely that she would divorce him. She will suffer pain, but she will be able to put the past behind her and begin constructing a new life for herself. The guy is forced to deal with the repercussions of his own decisions, and as a result, he is less likely to engage in risky behavior in his future romantic relationships since he has already experienced the pain of losing someone significant to him.
LOVE IS FOR-GIVING
There is no such thing as a healthy relationship that is free of conflict and suffering. It is unavoidable that partners in a relationship will, at some point or another, do harm to one another as they mature and develop together. It is an essential aspect of gaining an understanding of what is and is not acceptable within the context of the relationship.
It is necessary for both parties in a relationship to acknowledge and accept the fact that there may be moments when they behave inappropriately toward the other person and that this will occur. It’s crucial to make sure you’re on the same page as your partner when it comes to how you’re feeling, so don’t be afraid to talk it out. Forgiveness is an essential step in this process, and it is much preferable than getting even in terms of the benefits it provides to the relationship.
THE FINGER IN THE BULL’S-EYE
Revenge could provide you with a momentary sense of pleasure, but it often results in a vicious cycle of more victimization. If you despise what another person has done to you, doesn’t it logically follow that you will despise yourself much more if you repay the favor by doing the same thing to another person?
