Couples Who Have This in Common Stay Together 80% of the Time.
It should come as no surprise that couples who have communication styles that are compatible prefer to remain together. However, there’s a twist: experts now believe that four out of five couples who have writing styles that are compatible are likely to stay committed.
According to the findings of recent research, the likelihood that a relationship would last for a long time is significantly increased for couples that exhibit something called “written synchrony.”
Over the course of ten days, the researchers analyzed trends in the ordinary written communication of dating couples and documented their findings in a study that was published by the Association for Psychological Science.
In particular, they concentrated on online discussions, which they evaluated using a piece of software on a computer.
They discovered that over eighty percent of the couples whose writing styles were stylistic matches were still together three months later, in comparison to just fifty-four percent of the couples whose written styles didn’t match as well. This was a significant difference.
In particular, the participants’ usage of what are known as “function words” was investigated.
These are terms that demonstrate how nouns and verbs are related, and defining them without going into an in-depth grammar lecture might be challenging (examples include the, a, be, anything, that, will, him, and).
The manner in which we employ these apparently basic phrases dramatically impacts a person’s writing and speaking style, as one of the co-authors of the research, James W. Pennebaker, PhD, says. “Function words are very social, and using them properly requires a certain level of social competence,” he explains.
For this same reason, they tell a great deal about not just people but also relationships. These patterns in human speech give windows into the inner workings of our minds and how we interpret the things that are going on around us.
When these processes occur at the same time inside a pair, it suggests that they have a compatible perspective on the world. And as Pennebaker points out, individuals do not consciously attempt to synchronize their communication patterns:
“What’s beautiful about this,” he adds, “is that we don’t actually make that choice; it simply comes out of our lips.”
Another study that was carried out by the same group of researchers shown how fundamentally important those phrases are to the ways in which we communicate. Following the completion of a series of four-minute “speed dates” that the team had arranged for pairs of college students, the team evaluated the linguistic patterns that emerged throughout the dates.
They discovered that even while the chats covered many of the same topics—things like hometowns, majors, and interests, for example—their usage of function words was quite different from one another.
Even though they were unaware that they shared a trait, the couples that utilized function words in a similar manner expressed a desire to see one other again at a rate that was four times higher than average.
It’s possible that individuals in a relationship may discover that this new information offers a significant piece of the puzzle in determining whether or not their connection is compatible over the long run.
But even beyond that, it demonstrates that our compatibility extends so much deeper than our sentiments, beliefs, and interests:
it’s entrenched in the fundamental architecture of our ideas, and it’s discreetly conveyed every time we speak. In addition, if you want additional dating advice, check read the article Men Are More Likely To Regret This Relationship.
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