Why sex is better in a hotel room

Despite the fact that it opened nine years ago, the first Standard hotel in New York was nine months late. The proprietors, however, succumbed to public pressure and let visitors to stay while work was underway in the meanwhile. A controversial advertisement for the company, posted on sidewalks across downtown, read: “We’ll put up with your pounding if you’ll put up with ours.” Ample floor-to-ceiling windows facing the High Line’s walking people allowed exhibitionists to make the most of apartments that were custom-designed to their specifications. When the New York Post published an exposé on pearl-clutching, management stated that such filthy conduct was discouraged—only for numerous employees to inform an undercover reporter that the exact reverse was the case.

With its floor-to-ceiling windows and astonished neighbors, the newly opened Public on New York’s Lower East Side has evoked a feeling of filthy déjà vu among the locals. The antics seem appropriate, though; after all, a hotel is associated with mischief and the ability to act inappropriately. When we stay (or at least spend time) in a hotel, we feel freed from social conventions and politeness, despite the fact that we check in with plenty of identification and are almost always under close circuit video surveillance. When we’re on vacation, we’re free of the restrictions that govern our daily lives, whether they’re small (such as leaving a bed unmade) or significant (such as putting some’memorabilia’ from the trip into a suitcase).

There are a plethora of possible connections. The first location newlyweds spend the night together is in a hotel room during their honeymoon. When Phil and Claire Dunphy of Modern Family need a vacation from their children, they rent a room in a hotel and engage in some comedic role-playing. Modern Family Instead of food and alcohol, the minibar now often includes a “intimacy kit” (fluffy handcuffs, anyone?) whereas in-room television was previously the only option to watch X-rated movies in complete secrecy before. It was about 11 p.m. while I was on the late shift that folks would ring in and complain about their televisions. Please make certain that I do not incur any fees for the film.’ Nothing is known about the fact that you can log into the Lodgenet system and check—yes, they watched Naked Cheerleaders from Las Vegas for 14 minutes,” says Michael Fazio, author of Concierge Confidential, a humorous memoir about his nearly decade-long stint as a concierge at a New York City luxury hotel. “It seemed to happen nearly every night.”

Since the beginning, there has been a connection between hotels and sex encounters. According to Andrew K. Sandoval-book Strausz’s Hotel: An American History, inns and lodges have existed since the dawn of humanity, but the modern concept of a hotel originated in London. As a result of the French emigrés’ purchase of dilapidated, high-end homes in the once-ritzy Covent Garden neighborhood and operation as guest lodgings, the term “hotel” was coined. These once-grand piles were named as such because they resembled the palaces of French noblemen back home. Of course, Covent Garden was London’s entertainment district, and much of that merriment involved prostitution, and the distinction between a hotel and a brothel was sometimes difficult to discern back then, just as it can be today.

 Consider the rise of the hourly hotels, which are exclusively geared toward all kinds of extramarital assignments, including love hotels in Japan, Guatemala’s ‘auto hotels,’ and Brazil’s motels, which have drive-in garages that allow guests complete anonymity. Businesses wanting a peaceful place to work, according to the U.S. company Hotels By Day, whose business strategy involves renting rooms by the hour rather than overnight, rather than by the day (though explicit uses are more implicit).

An overnight stay is attractive to couples because it provides full freedom from the stresses of daily life, such as household duties and children, and allows them to reconnect. According to sex therapist Xanet Pailet of The Power of the Pleasure, with that freedom comes an increase in desire. 

The author explains that “spending a night at a hotel enables us to get away from everything that stresses us out and the daily grind, as well as giving us permission to rest and be pampered.” In the absence of interruptions from the kids or an important email that has to be sent, you may relax and be really present with your spouse. ” Additionally, you have the option of taking your time, which is a luxury for most couples.” Anonymity and exhibitionism have a dual appeal: like the Dunphys, you may role-play and re-imagine your relationship without anybody overhearing your conversations.

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Kit Kemp, renowned interior designer, is a traveler-to-traveller.

As an obligation-free zone, the hotel provides the following services: Put your feet up in the bath and you won’t have to worry about cleaning it afterwards; housekeeping will take care of everything mundane that might stifle sexual moments in everyday life, such as folding the towels and making the bed; and hang the “Do Not Disturb” sign on the door and you will be completely alone. It also helps to start conversations when you are in a new place. As human beings, we are always looking for something new to try: the latest software, the latest book, the latest fashion trend.” It’s just not romantic to have sex in the same room, on the same bed, when the kids and the dogs are there after a while,” Pailet explains. 

The pleasure and reward regions of our brains respond positively to novelty, according to scientific evidence. Novelty stimulates the production of dopamine, a complex hormone that works like feel-good juice on the pleasure and reward centers, according to research.

Marissa Nelson, a relationship therapist, believes so firmly in the therapeutic potential of holiday sex that she has built a whole company around it: IntimacyMoons. When Nelson began working with individuals who were experiencing marital difficulties many years ago, he noticed a common pattern among them. Traveling to a hotel was a popular method for some couples to contemplate whether to split or remain together; those who did so typically decided to stay together after gushing about how well they had reconnected during their vacation.

 Responding to these challenges, she founded her own company, which whisks a small group of couples away for a few days to the Crane Hotel in Barbados. The holiday combines private couples’ therapy sessions with time for participants to relax and unwind (rates start at $2,500 per couple, per week). Escape, according to her, “breeds vitality and aliveness.” “People leave their normal surroundings and give themselves permission to let go, to open themselves up to pleasure and closeness. ” According to one of my clients, who came to me after three years of no sex [with her husband], “they arrived in the hotel room and immediately went skinny swimming in the pool.”

Despite the fact that hotels are known for their sex, as former concierge Michael Fazio points out, they are also known for their romantic attraction. When a guy asked, “Could you come into the room and scatter flowers all over the bed while we’re at dinner?” he remembers, “that was very usual.” Our workstations used to have a supply of rose petals on hand.