The Worst Misconception People Have About Their Single Coworkers During the Holidays
At a time when many individuals are preparing to take time off for the December holidays, employees in particular sectors are being allocated to work extra hours on days when they would otherwise be absent.
What is the fate of the people who are trapped with such shifts? Companies give holiday workdays to persons who are single and/or do not have children under the mistaken idea that they need less time off than their colleagues who are married and/or have children. This is a mistake.
Take it from Sophie, a social worker at a local hospital. Her current paid position does not promote the notion that unmarried women need or deserve less time off, but she claims that the notion “came up all the time” when she worked in retail and freelance jobs.
So much so that she claimed she internalized it by volunteering to work big holidays, explaining that she didn’t have a family and so didn’t need to be at home for “insert holiday here.” When did I stop having a family?!’ In order to fully neglect my parents, sister, and chosen family, I was consuming Kool-Aid to stay awake while volunteering for hectic shifts.”
The Worst Misconception People Have About Their Single Coworkers During the Holidays
Those who are unmarried and/or childless should be cautious not to make the assumption that they don’t need as much vacation time as other individuals.
As social scientist Bella DePaulo explains, what Sophie and many other single, childless workers are experiencing is known as “singlism.” Singlism is defined as the stigmatization and discrimination of persons who are single, regardless of their age or marital status.
In her research, DePaulo discovered that single persons are often stigmatized as having no life outside of their jobs.
The Worst Misconception People Have About Their Single Coworkers During the Holidays
According to her prior statements to HuffPost, “Of course, it is completely incorrect.” In addition to having relationships that matter to them, single individuals also have obligations, interests, and hobbies that matter to them,” says the author.
The fact is that [the] workplace should be about work, thus none of this should be a consideration. Everything should balance out over time how frequently you get to leave early, come in on holidays, have your choice of vacation dates, and so on — so that every employee is treated the same, and marital status or parental status should not be taken into consideration.”
Isn’t it true that if you don’t have children to support or a spouse with whom to spend time, you deserve to take a well-deserved vacation? It seems that a disproportionate number of employers believe this.
Reader Emily submitted her experience with single discrimination in response to a HuffPost callout on the issue. She said that she was always the one who had to sacrifice time with her family and loved ones because of her employment as a college development specialist.
According to her, “there was never any doubt.” The consequences were devastating to my personal relationships: family members were disappointed that I was unable to attend family events, and my significant other was dissatisfied that I had allowed work to take precedence over our relationship and home life.
Our relationship was on the verge of disintegrating.
“I enjoyed my career and the benefits that came with it, both professionally and personally.” However, there are moments when you just despise it and wonder, “Why me again?”
Patricio, a former military staff member
An anonymous reader called Patricia said that she was given extended deployments at her military employment, which frequently coincided with holidays, due to the fact that she had not yet married.
According to her, her boss’s reasoning for firing her was simple: “I was single.” “Can’t you see that I don’t consider my child to be part of the family?” My career and the benefits of both business and pleasure were a dream come true for me… It is possible to despise it and wonder, “Why me?” at other times. Again?’”
Assignment of holiday shifts may be done in a more equitable manner.
So, what system would be preferable? A single solution does not exist. Some firms establish holiday schedules based on seniority, however managers should be aware that this method excludes a large number of individuals.
Mary Abbajay, head of the leadership development firm Careerstone Group, said that “seniority often implies it will benefit those who have kids and who are likely to be older.” Women without children have been driven to work on holiday days, she said, particularly in areas such as health care and retail that are dependent on shift labor.
They shouldn’t just go with the flow and see what happens. To make the process more equitable, Abbajay suggests that they consider incorporating workers who have been harmed by it and see what they provide as alternatives.
The Worst Misconception People Have About Their Single Coworkers During the Holidays
“You could turn that into an equation.” The benefit of seniority is worth one point; but, if you did not use it last year, you may lose a point. The folks who have been there the longest, or those have children, are automatically denied it because of some rule in place. For some of the folks, you may want to consider holding a lottery,” Abbajay said.” In the end, think outside the box about how you might make this seem more equitable and inclusive.
She went on to say that employers should consider rewarding workers who work during the holidays with money or a modest gift. “Something along the lines of ‘You know what, I truly appreciate that you took the fall for this one.'” You want your employees to feel valued and appreciated at all times, particularly if they are required to labor throughout the holiday period.
It would also be possible to get additional paid time off.
According to Sophie, her recommendation would be for businesses to first advertise holiday shifts, “because there are certainly persons who choose to work those schedules for a number of reasons,” she said. Following that, whomever worked the prior year or years should be approached and asked whether they would be interested in doing it again this year.” Instead, create a rotating timetable or draw names from a hat if they don’t comply.”
It’s possible to bring up the subject of holiday shifts with your supervisor as a request rather than a complaint, according to Abbajay, if you’re a single, unmarried employee who continues being assigned to them. Get your Christmas requests in as soon as possible while you’re waiting.
Because she was early, “it’s difficult to say no,” she said. “It’s difficult to say no when you’re early.”
While it is true that Sophie no longer volunteers for holiday jobs, she believes she has learned her lesson.
Her older contemporaries who were retired, as well as her coworkers who had grown children, assisted her in realizing that she, like everyone else, needed time off for the holidays.
Because of COVID, she was required to work all of the main holidays she celebrates, including Thanksgiving, Christmas Eve and Day, and New Year’s Eve and Day. Now, when I was requested to work the same holidays again, I smiled and said that “I already put in my time and that this year I was taking all of them off,” she recalled.
The Worst Misconception People Have About Their Single Coworkers During the Holidays
