Life is a delicate balancing act in so many ways. However, although it is critical to know what we want (you can’t shoot a target if you don’t know what you want), life has a way of throwing unexpected factors in our face.
It is impossible to predict the future, which is something Kate Bowler, author of the highly anticipated book No Cure for Being Human, is all too familiar with. As a result of a severe cancer diagnosis acquired at the age of 35, Kate’s life was thrown into disarray, and she was forced to confront some of the hardest, but most beautiful realities of life. With new perspectives on our culture’s “best life now” advice business, as well as themes of religion and ambition, this book has something to offer everyone interested in learning more about what it means to be a person.
Get a sense of how author Kate Bowler skillfully transforms the frailty of our human experience into something meaningful in the passage below.. Purchase a copy of the book for additional information.
By Kate Bowler, author of “There Is No Cure for Being Human.”
I decided to take my family to visit one of the seven natural wonders of the world, the Grand Canyon, a few years ago while I had some downtime between scans. This is something that should be on everyone’s bucket list! An unassuming church nestled among the tall pines of the ponderosa pine forest was just off Route 66 for me. For miles and miles, there are no settlements at all. Because I was curious, I went to the front door and saw that it was open. I cautiously entered.
A tiny sanctuary, it was unheated and inelegant ill its design and layout. The floor was loose gravel, and someone had put together several benches to sit in front of a large slab of stone that served as a memorial to those who died there. In contrast, the setting sun’s orange light streamed through the windows and illuminated the walls, which were covered in graffiti, some of it new, some of it older.
When I was done, I ran my fingertips over the black ink that covered the altar and the pen markings that were digging into the soft wooden walls. Every square inch of it was covered with text on both sides.
My thoughts and feelings for you are with me at all times.
Keep my kid in the same frame of mind as she was before.
Has your journey to paradise been successful, my darling?
I’m sorry, Helen, but I’m not strong enough. That, though, you were already aware.
I went to search for something. I found something. In the rafters and cracks of the wall, hundreds of slips of paper were crammed together. Each and every one of the individuals who have been thrown into the gaps of the cosmos, their lives turned upside down by the most little events. Though we attempt to outwit our limits and unfortunate circumstances, we find ourselves screaming the truth into the abyss instead of finding a solution. Being human is a disease that cannot be cured or prevented.
Is there a time when you were making great progress toward your goal or changing your habits — whether it was exercising or getting up earlier in the morning, becoming more organized, eating healthier, or anything else — and your progress was completely derailed by a major event in your life (death, marriage, illness, work, or something else)?
You have, without a doubt, accomplished this. Each of us has experienced it.
It’s impossible to avoid life’s interruptions.
Even though we often abandon our objectives when something like this occurs, a life event that causes you to lose sight of your objective does not necessarily have to totally derail your progress. The hurdle — and it is an impediment, just like any other — is one that you can conquer.
The following question came in from reader quench recently:
For the most part, I have a single objective, like you advise. I am completely focused on the one goal, the baby stages, and so on. ” Then, out of nowhere, there’s a crisis in another area of my life — my partner will become very demanding, my brother will be hospitalized with a life-threatening disease, my employer will declare that there’s an emergency and that I must work overtime, and so on and so forth! Each and every time I start truly focusing on what I need to do to achieve my objective, this occurs with such regularity that it’s almost predictable. Then, when I’m completely discouraged and uninspired, everything else in my life appears to settle down, and I’m left wondering how to get myself back on track.”
Due to the fact that it is so true to reality, this is an excellent question. Something bad happens to everyone at some point… However, the real question is how we will deal with them in the long run. Is it better to get disheartened and quit up, or to find a method to overcome our difficulties and continue?
Here’s the thing: every goal has a slew of stumbling blocks in its way. If you are going to be successful, you have to expect that you will encounter difficulties… come up with creative solutions to get around them in order to maintain momentum
That may be accomplished in the following ways:
Expect, anticipate Prepare for the future by considering the following:
Is there anything that stands in your way? Describe some of the difficulties you’ve encountered before. What is it that will cause you to alter your daily schedule? Weekends are a mini-obstacle that frequently appears to derail people who are attempting to establish a new habit or habitual behavior. There are, however, additional modifications to daily activities…. It’s common to be able to foresee and prepare for things like holidays, summer, major events, changes at work, and birthdays. In the event that you anticipate anything that may disrupt your plans, have a strategy to deal with it. Incorporate it into your overall strategy.
As an example, I’ve been working hard to learn how to eat according to my new meal plan… and I was aware that a birthday celebration was approaching. That’s okay; I expected that and included it into my strategy after learning about the restaurant and researching the menu. On another occasion, though, I just expected a family gathering and allowed it to serve as one of my two cheat meals for the week. If you want to stay with it for the long haul, you must be willing to relax a bit.
Finding the route.
Are you going to quit up as soon as you encounter a difficulty? Not at all, I hope. An barrier is just something that we must go around or over in order to continue… It is not a cause to give up on one’s career. Instead of giving up, ask yourself, “How can I get past this obstacle?” instead. If you think beyond the box, there is always a solution.
Not every road leads to the same destination. In addition, deciding which option to use may be difficult. Be calm and pick one route and see whether it will work for you. A other method should be tried if the first doesn’t work. Life is an experiment in which we are constantly testing our assumptions.
Take two steps forward and one stride backward It is certain that you may encounter some difficulties.
If a goal is too simple to achieve, it is not an important objective. If it is too easy, it is not a worthwhile goal to pursue.
To avoid becoming discouraged by a setback, just embrace it as a necessary part of the trip. This is what I constantly remind myself: “Two steps forward, one step back… as well as the knowledge that, despite setbacks, I am still making forward progress in the long term.
For example, I’ve had a number of setbacks in my fitness regimen. After a few weeks of intense physical activity, I often get ill. But, despite the fact that sickness has put me back a few times, I’ve learnt to see it as a pleasant respite that allows my body to heal. It’s like taking a break when you’re ill; when you’re well, you’ll be re-energized and eager to go back to work.
If you fall, get back up and use the experience to improve your future performance.
At some point, we all fall short of our goals. None of us achieves success on a consistent basis. You just need to stand up and brush yourself off, rather than allowing failure to totally derail your plans. Learn from your mistakes, and this is a critical aspect of the process: Ask yourself why you failed when you make a mistake. What was it that kept me from going farther. What were the stumbling blocks that I had to overcome? Moreover, what strategies can I use to avoid them the next time this occurs? (and yes, it will happen again). Make a note of when you’ll do it again.
As an example, I failed many times when attempting to stop smoking. Every time, though, I questioned myself as to what went wrong. My train of thought was disrupted. Also, I factored in such roadblocks while developing my strategy. Stressful situations, going out with friends and drinking (and smoking) with them, and stressful family events were all factors that contributed to my relapse in my smoking. After a long struggle, I was finally successful…. However, I would not have been able to do this if I had just continued to let the same hurdles to derail me.
Look for fresh sources of inspiration and determination.
A setback may cause us to become not just demotivated, but also derailed. The true difficulty is in summoning the will to begin anew. For this reason, it’s helpful to start from scratch and consider why you wanted to begin with the project in the first place. What was the driving force behind your decision to make a switch? What was it that spurred you on to take this step? Motivating yourself by thinking about it, and about the advantages it will bring to your life, as well as the way things will be after you’ve achieved your objective, may be very effective.
Adding extra motivators, on the other hand, may help you get off to a faster start. You may learn more about motivation by reading this article as well as some other related articles.
Allow yourself to get carried along. It is beneficial to change. All of us must deal with change at some point in our lives. There will always be something to throw a wrench in our plans, no matter how much we like our routines or how well they work for us. It’s important to accept this, embrace it, and learn to go with the flow. Become overly stiff and we shall crumble under the weight of life’s responsibilities and demands. However, if we can learn to adapt to the changes that life throws at us while continuing to work towards our objective, we will be happier and more likely to achieve it.
Be ready to adjust your plans when circumstances change.. You are being slammed with change… Don’t give up or get discouraged… You should include that adjustment into your strategy.
Curveballs will be thrown at us by life at every turn. The ability to knock them out of the park may be learned via repetition.
