Do These 6 Things To Develop Your Self-Esteem
The Relationship Between Self-Esteem and Intelligence
There has never been a research that suggests that having high self-esteem is associated with having a high IQ. This is not a surprise development. Although we are born with inherent qualities such as intelligence, self-esteem is determined by our method of employing those qualities, such as the choices we make about awareness, the honesty with which we relate to reality, and the degree of our own personal integrity.
Self-esteem is neither a competitive or a comparison phenomenon. Its context is always the individual’s connection to himself or herself, as well as the decisions he or she makes. When compared to a person with high self-esteem but low intellect, a person with high self-esteem but low intelligence does not feel more suited to life or more deserving of happiness.
An analogy may be useful in this situation. It is possible for two persons to be equally healthy and physically fit, yet one person is physically stronger than the other. The stronger person does not feel a better sense of physical well-being; rather, the stronger person can do certain tasks that the weaker person cannot.
Looking at both from the outside, we can see that one has certain distinct benefits over the other in certain situations. However, this does not imply that there is a difference in the internal sense of well-being and aliveness between the two groups.
1.Individualistic Ways of Thinking
The commitment to awareness or the desire to comprehend is accompanied with an underlying assumption of intellectual independence. No one has the ability to think in the shoes of another. However, knowledge is not just repetition or imitation; rather, it is comprehension of the subject matter.
The choice is ours: either we use our own intellect or we delegate the duty for information and assessment to others, and then accept their conclusions with little or no question. The decision we make has a significant impact on how we see ourselves and on the sort of life we lead in the future.
2.It is critical to have goals and intentions.
Despite the fact that we are sometimes influenced by others in ways that we are unaware of, there is a distinct difference between the psychology of those who attempt to understand things for themselves, think for themselves, and judge for themselves and the psychology of those for whom such a possibility is rare. A person’s purpose, as well as their ultimate aim, are critical considerations in this scenario.
When I was in therapy with a client, she said to me, “I don’t see why I’m constantly depending on the views of other people.”
“Did you ever desire to be independent as a child — did you ever set yourself the aim of being independent?” I inquired of her.
Following some deliberation, she responded with a firm “no.”
“There’s no reason to be shocked that you didn’t show up,” I said.
Using the phrase “thinking independently” is effective since it adds emphasis and is a good way to avoid repetition. Sometimes, what people term “thinking” is nothing more than rehashing other people’s thoughts and ideas. Consequently, we can claim that thinking independently — about our job, our relationships, the principles that will govern our lives, and the objectives that we will set for ourselves — is a generator of self-confidence. Furthermore, having a positive self-image leads to a natural tendency to think for oneself.
3.Developing One’s Self-Esteem The answer is no,
The following is what someone may say if they just saw the finish of the process I’m describing: “For him, it’s simple to think on his own. Examine his level of self-confidence.” Self-esteem, on the other hand, is not something that comes naturally; it must be worked at.
Developing self-esteem involves thinking independently when it is not easy to do so, when doing so may be terrifying, when the person doing the thinking is dealing with emotions of insecurity and doubt, but who chooses to persist regardless of the difficulties they are experiencing.
When it comes to standing by our judgment, it is not always easy, and if it has become easier, that is a psychological victory in and of itself — because there have been times in the past when it was not easy, when the pressures against independent thought were great, and when we had to confront and endure anxiety, to name a few examples.
do these 6 things to develop your self-esteem
It is difficult for a kid to know whether to listen to his or her own perceptions, emotions, and judgements or to disavow them in favor of those of parents or other family members when his or her views, feelings, and judgments differ from those of parents or other family members. The situation occurs when a woman thinks that her husband is incorrect on a basic subject, and the decision arises as to whether she should voice her feelings or hide them in order to preserve the “closeness” of the marriage.
In the case of an artist or scientist who suddenly sees a path that would take him or her far away from the common beliefs and values of colleagues, far away from the mainstream of contemporary orientation and opinion, the question arises as to whether to continue down that lonely path or to turn back. In all of these scenarios, the problem and the task are the same. Should one listen to one’s inner impulses or should one ignore them entirely.
Independence against conformity, self-expression versus self-repudiation, self-assertion versus self-surrender are all concepts that may be used to compare and contrast two opposing viewpoints or concepts.
4.Consciousness Is A Heroic Being
Despite the fact that it may be required from time to time, we do not normally appreciate being isolated from the thoughts and ideas of others around us, particularly those we respect and love. It is one of the most significant types of heroism to be able to accept one’s own solitude; this is known as heroism of awareness or heroism of mind.
Independence is a question of degree, just like any other psychological attribute. Although no one can be completely independent all of the time and no one can be completely reliant all of the time, the greater our degree of independence and the more our willingness to think for ourselves, the higher our level of self-esteem tends to be on a consistent basis.
5. Discovering Your Own Discrimination.
If a person hasn’t learnt to distinguish between realities on the one hand and wants and fears on the other, he or she will never feel appropriately effective (that is, competent to deal with the fundamental issues of life).
Due to the fact that ideas are usually affected by or sometimes soaked with emotion, the job might be challenging at times.
Despite this, we might understand on a number of times that the desire to execute a certain action does not always imply that we should carry out that activity. In the middle of a disagreement, we can decide to leave the room because we’re feeling frustrated. It is also not necessary to avoid completing an activity because we are frightened of doing so in order to prevent it. An additional example would be going to the doctor for a checkup if there are any indications of sickness.
Purchasing something we know we cannot afford and refusing to think about upcoming debts we will not be able to pay demonstrates that we have given our awareness to our desires. In a marriage, if we disregard warning indications of trouble, we might later claim to be perplexed and concerned as the situation worsens…
When our marriage eventually comes crashing down, we have paid the price for abandoning awareness to fear.
6.Our Overarching Goal
It is not the question of whether or not we are perfect in our execution of the job of distinguishing between facts, wants, and fears and choosing consciousness over some type of avoidance that is important in terms of our self-esteem. As opposed to this, the problem is one of our underlying aim.
“Basically honest,” in the sense intended here, does not imply that a person is impervious to the effect of one’s desires and anxieties, but rather that one has a strong desire to see things as they really are and to act on that desire and purpose. We can’t always tell whether or not we’re being reasonable or honest, but we can surely be worried about it and care about it when it happens. We are not always free to be successful in our thinking, but we are always free to attempt it and see whether it works.
Because of our collective decisions, we develop an inner feeling of fundamental honesty or dishonesty — as well as fundamental duty or irresponsibility for the rest of existence. Some people are significantly more interested in and appreciative of such problems of truth than others from an early age.
Some believe that facts do not need to be truths if we do not want to admit them, that truth is immaterial, and that falsehoods are only lies if they are discovered.
Our job as aware beings is to perceive all that is around us to the best of our abilities. To appreciate reality — the sense of what is true — is to honor awareness; to honor consciousness is to honor one’s own self-esteem.
7.Integrity
A person’s conduct that is consistent with their stated values, convictions, and beliefs may be identified in situations when they have high self-esteem. We perceive honesty and reliability.
Face is lost when we act in ways that are inconsistent with our own judgments about what is right. We have little regard for ourselves. If we grow used to the policy, we begin to have less faith in ourselves — or perhaps less trust in ourselves altogether.
In their attempt to distance oneself from philosophy in general and ethics in particular, psychologists are often uneasy with anything that sounds like a reference to morality in the context of psychotherapy or psychological well-being.
As a result, they may overlook the obvious fact that integrity is, in effect, one of the guardians of mental health, and that it is cruel and misleading to lead people to believe that practicing “unconditional positive regard” toward themselves will lead them to undiluted self-love, regardless of the question of their personal integrity.
