8 Steps to a Successful and Happy Marriage
Weddings are the last stage in establishing your relationship as a legally recognized union with the help of society.
It’s like to proclaiming to the rest of society that you and your partner have chosen to remain together. The commitment you make in a relationship is the strongest and most genuine you will ever make.
The Secrets to a Long and Happy Marriage
Marriage, in its ideal form, represents a union of intellect and spirit.
A marriage is often considered to be difficult labor. Two persons who are diametrically opposed to one another come together with the aim of spending the rest of their lives in each other’s company. So far, everything is going well.
Living together, on the other hand, requires a great deal of adjustment on a micro level that movies and romance do not prepare you for — sharing a home, eating habits, sleeping habits, friends, entertainment habits, job, in-laws, and the list goes on and on.
When you put your life under the microscope, things may get rather confusing.
So, here are 11 tips to help you maintain your marriage pleasant, stable, and stress-free.
1. Keep your sense of self-identity.
Each of you is a unique person. Do not stoop to your partner’s level to accommodate him or her. You would eventually get resentful of it and demand the same from your spouse, who would have become used to your being responsible for everything by this point.
Everyone in the marriage should be allowed to be themselves without feeling like they have to pretend. Adjustment and compromise should be a two-way street — one that is applicable for both husband and wife.
2. Give each other some breathing room.
Many newlyweds feel imprisoned in their relationship after their wedding. They are trapped in their roles as a spouse – their responsibilities, their tasks, and their positions.
If this is not addressed immediately, it has the potential to cause widespread disruption.
The key here is to give each other some breathing room to pursue personal growth.
This would be time that you set apart for yourself – for example, a guy may spend time with his male friends doing things that men normally love, while a woman could do something that she enjoys doing.
A little time apart from each other helps to make the connection more enjoyable. If it is not present, the situation becomes stifling.
3. Maintain open channels of communication.
Whatever occurs, be sure to maintain your lines of communication open.
There are instances when differences of opinion make it difficult to communicate with one another. Once you stop discussing your views with one another, it becomes a habit, and you gradually grow apart without even realizing what has happened.
Your disappointments, your criticism, your grief, your anticipation and your love must all be expressed in written form.
Communication channels between couples should be kept open at all times.
4. Fight in a positive manner.
There is no such thing as a happy marriage without strife.
When you speak about two individuals that live together, it is certain that there will be some kind of quarrel.
When you quarrel, on the other hand, do not criticize the person, but rather the conduct. Instead of blaming others, try to articulate yourself in terms of your own sentiments.
For example, when you explain unpleasant things, I could feel hurt, disappointed, sad, or furious; rather than saying you are disappointing, bothersome, worthless, cruel, or any other negative adjective.
When unpleasant sentiments are discussed in the context of conduct, it is simpler to understand them. Otherwise, the spouse who is being attacked will get defensive, and the dispute will turn into a competition to show themselves correct while the other person is wrong.
5. Show consideration for one another’s sentiments
In sharing their lives with one another, spouses also share a great deal of personal and sensitive information with one another.
The idea is to never express these feelings in public or in front of friends or family members while you are angry. While it is simple to spill the beans, it is far more difficult to reverse the damage caused by such transgressions.
Maintain the secrecy of one another’s secrets. Never violate your partner’s confidence. This is one of those things that, once gone, can never be recovered in the same proportion.
6. Work out a mutually beneficial agreement with one another.
A marriage will need a great deal of compromise on the part of both partners. Be willing to make concessions in order to make the other person happy.
Whatever the issue is, whether it’s a little detail like the color of your curtains or a large one like having his mother live with you, always attempt to understand the other person’s point of view and find a middle ground.
Be reasonable – ask for as much as you would want to get, and always keep the other person’s emotions in mind.
Children are number seven.
The responsibilities of parenting must be handled equally by both parents. Sharing parenting is a fantastic opportunity for a couple to get closer in their relationship. When children know that their parents are in love with each other, they always feel emotionally secure and joyful.
Finances are number eight.
This is one of the most difficult topics to discuss and one that may cause devastation in a marriage.
The idea here is to make a decision on how your funds will be handled early on in your marriage. You may pick if you want to have a joint account or separate accounts and determine together who is responsible for certain bills.
Finances should be dealt with with care and clarity, since they have the potential to cause profound animosity in a relationship.
9. Chores around the house
Both couples are of legal age, and both should be competent to handle all of the household responsibilities. This is even more critical if both couples are actively involved in their own professions.
Taking care of the children, paying bills, purchasing food, shopping (outside of the house tasks), washing dishes, cooking, and cleaning – all of these responsibilities should be handled equally so that neither partner feels overwhelmed.
Recreation and vacation are number 10 on the list.
It is important to make sure that the vacation choice is one that both partners will like. If one spouse has a strong preference for a certain situation (such as a fishing trip), the next option should give precedence to the other spouse in that situation.
Love and Intimacy are number 11 on the list.
When intimacy in a marriage begins to wane before the age of fifty, it is a warning sign that trouble is brewing. Physical intimacy is a kind of love that is specific to the husband-wife (couple) relationship and is an expression of love.
Put forth your best effort to keep your partner’s desire and passion alive. Maintain your fitness, be conscious of how you dress and your personal grooming, pay close attention to your personal cleanliness, and continue to court each other. Passion is something that will always make the other person feel unique and loved.
As you can see, a good marriage requires a lot of effort, compromise, love, and sharing on both sides. Although love may serve as the cornerstone of a successful marriage, it is necessary to intentionally maintain its vitality and vigor.