8 basic important Christian dating tips

in the process of looking for and becoming a suitable marital partner When it comes to your personal connection with God, you want that person to be aware of and share your faith with them since it is the most significant aspect of who you are, and preferably of who he is as well.

 

 

Difficulties in Leading a Meaningful Life

So many people in the dating scene are open about their religious beliefs and are supportive of one another’s spiritual development. They also have a problem, in that, there are aspects of their dating lives where they do not “walk the walk.” Over time, they demonstrate a persistent pattern of weakness or struggle that does not seem to be able to be resolved by themselves.

 

 

 It might be related to sex, dishonesty, immature methods of dispute resolution, or difficulties of control. Whatever the case may be, their spiritual life has not had the desired effect on their character. They are torn apart by a terrible division, or by a contradiction, between what they believe and what they do.

 

In many cases, this splintered life is not the result of a lack of religious commitment. Indeed, they may have a strong spiritual connection. A dual existence is more due to their failure to integrate their wants and way of life into God’s methods of satisfying needs, rather than anything else. As we shall see in the chapter on physical relationships, sexual acting out may be used as a shortcut to achieving closeness or meeting other needs.

 

 

 It is possible that the desire to save an immature date from the repercussions of his bad temper is motivated by a fear of being honest and righteous. The inability to emotionally leave home and function as an independent adult may manifest itself as a series of back-and-forth relationships that require a lot of breaking up and making up.

 

I was having a business lunch with a guy who was unfamiliar with my religious beliefs. We were chit-chatting about our respective lifestyles in order to get to know one another better. This guy spent a significant amount of time speaking negatively about his wife, as well as discussing a large number of other women in a sexually explicit manner. We somehow ended up talking about religion, and I shared my own beliefs. 

 

 

He immediately identified himself as a Christian and started speaking in awe-inspiring words about God’s grace and his abiding devotion to Christ. Because of how drastically he had changed, I was beginning to doubt that I was dating the same person.

 

 

 However, as I listened, the spiritual material seemed a little manufactured, as if it were a sermon that he had already spoken a few times. I suppose he was a believer in some sense. This individual, on the other hand, had the kind of divided existence that makes life a misery. This is the kind of divide that many individuals experience in themselves or in their relationships….

 

Whatever the root of the problem, there are spiritual solutions to these problems, and the couple has to be working on them. That is why you want to be dating someone who is not just of the religion, but who is also conscious of his or her own shortcomings and concerns, and who is actively working on them, whether via accountability groups, support groups, or therapy. It may be quite hard to spend a lifetime with someone who has a character flaw that has never been addressed.

 

Because of this, it is very crucial to speak out and discuss issues that are troubling you with your date as they arise. Bring it up if you sense any inconsistencies in him or in the way the relationship is progressing.

 

If he is a decent guy, he will most likely be thankful that you took a chance on him, and you may both work together to resolve the situation. Don’t hold him or yourself to a standard of perfection. Instead, righteousness should be demanded. A virtuous person maintains a spiritual connection with God, his source.

 

However, when he stumbles and falls, he will take the correction graciously and will re-establish his connection with God.

 

 

Playing an active role in each other’s development

Another facet of the spiritual side of dating is the fact that you both need to be important to each other on a spiritual level in order to be together. While this tends to expand with time as the relationship deepens and becomes more committed, the general concept is that you both need to be involved in each other’s growth and behavior.

 

 

 However, even if your relationship does not end up in marriage, you must have the mindset that throughout your time together as dates, you will both improve spiritually. Here are some examples of how you and your friends may support and encourage one another.

 

 

Input and feedback are both important.

As your relationship develops, your knowledge of each other’s difficulties and requirements should increase as well. Your date is in an enviable situation with you, and he or she may be aware of or see things in you that others do not see or recognize. 

 

 

It is necessary to allow each other freedom to confront, provide advice, and support one other on spiritual levels as the relationship progresses into the more committed phases. It’s a sign that something is wrong if your date is resistant to spiritual criticism, since the Bible has harsh words for people who can’t take it: “Whoever corrects a mocker invites reproach; whoever rebukes a wicked man incurs abuse” (Proverbs 9:7).

 

 

Allow for some time to pass.

To put it another way, it is often a good idea to let some time and experiences to pass between you before tackling anything significant. “Be quick to listen, slow to talk,” as the saying goes (James 1:19). It’s possible that you misunderstood something that you’ll come to understand better with time. 

 

 

Alternatively, you can see an act that will never be done again, resulting in what you thought was a pattern being shown to be a one-time occurrence.
Alternatively, you may need to allow time to pass in order for enough grace to develop between you that you are not seen as a condemning judge.
Keep in mind that we all need grace before we can hear the truth.

 

 

Don’t Take on the Role of a Parent

Stay away from the temptation to assume the position of spiritual responsibility for your date’s well-being. Establishing a relationship in which she is performing and developing under your supervision is not recommended. Why? Because children only have one primary responsibility, and that is to abandon their parents.
If you are the father, she must grow up and leave you in order to fulfill God’s plan for her to reach the age of majority and become an adult.

 

This was a mistake made by a buddy of mine. He became over over heels in love with a lady whom he then proceeded to mentor. He guided her through a number of Bible studies, assigned her chores, and required her to read books. He was ecstatic about it up until the day she left him for another man, claiming that he had become too controlling. He had a traumatic experience as a result of it. He did, however, take something away from the experience. “The next time, I’ll delegate the disciplining to someone else,” he said to me.

 

 

 

Both Comfort and Difficulty

Good relationships include not just giving and receiving criticism, but also giving and receiving enough permission to soothe each other’s pains and criticize one other’s shortcomings. Make certain that you and your partner are doing both. Some relationships are built on mutual comfort, but there is no encouragement to push one other further.
And some are highly demanding, but they can also be harsh and critical in their assessments. Be both soothing and demanding at the same time.

 

 

 

Compatibility on a spiritual level

Spiritual compatibility, or the degree to which you and your partner are compatible in your religious beliefs, is an important consideration while dating. On the surface, this seems to be a straightforward situation to deal with. It is, on the other hand, a very tough one.

 

 

 

The Problem of Design

The simple thing is that God has created you to have intimate relationships with him and with others. We may be confident in the fact that this is a part of our makeup.
In addition, it implies that the deepest part of you has been compelled to seek spiritual contact with another person. If that part of you is functioning correctly, you will actively seek for spirituality in those who are in good health.

 

 

In the end, you will be interested in and attracted to those who have a similar spiritual experience to yours. If anything is wrong with you on the inside, you will most likely find yourself attracted to spirituality that is toxic or nonexistent. As a result, at this level, spiritual compatibility serves as a diagnostic tool for assessing our own spiritual health. There are, however, certain additional concerns.

 

 

The Path of Spiritual Development

Spiritual progress implies that you are no longer the person you were or the person you will become. With patience and endurance throughout the process,