12 Things All Sex Experts Have In Their Bedrooms

The bedroom is where the magic occurs – at least, that’s how it seems to me most of the time… It is possible to make a room more pleasurable by having the correct supplies on hand. This is true whether you are engaging in sexual activity with a partner, masturbating, or just resting.

Several professionals, ranging from sex therapists to sex educators, were consulted to determine what they always have on hand. (By far the most often stated item? Lube!) They provide some of their own suggestions in the section below.

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1. Use only high-quality lubricant.

“I believe that every nightstand should be stocked with a high-quality lubricant since you never know when you could find yourself in need of one.” The body’s capacity to create natural lubrication varies from moment to moment and day to day, and most people don’t like sex that includes an excessive lot of friction,” according to the CDC. — Amy Baldwin, co-host of the “Shameless Sex” podcast and Uberlube’s chief educational representative

The presence of a high-quality lubrication may transform a mediocre sex into a fantastic one. It will assist you in your exploration of numerous erogenous zones. Women of all ages may have vaginal dryness as a result of a lack of sleep, hormonal changes, or a change in nutrition. The use of a few drops of lubrication may help to reduce membrane tears and improve the overall experience.” NAZANIN MOALI, a sex therapist who also hosts the “Sexology” podcast, says:

2.A vibrator

“The Hitachi Magic Wand is a fantastic tool for getting things done! To get the party started, I utilize it myself and suggest that my customers do the same to transform receptive desire (the sort that hides under the surface, waiting to be lit) into active want (the passion). Preserving the function of our pleasure pathways is beneficial to our entire well-being, both in and out of the bedroom. 

In my investigation, I discovered that the brain is the most significant of all the sex organs. My female research participants were able to activate their pleasure regions in their brains just by thinking about pleasant stimulation! The use of a vibrator on a daily basis may assist to improve our pleasure pathways,” says the researcher. — Nan Wise, a sex therapist, neuroscientist, and author of “Why Good Sex Matters,” among other works.

3. Chargers for a variety of sexual accessories

The reason for this is because, contrary to what the vast majority of television productions and movies as well as literature and music and other media are eager to portray, sex does occasionally need a little preparation! — Symonne Kennedy, a psychotherapist at The Gender and Sexuality Therapy Center in New York City

4. Lights that can be dimmed

“Although it’s convenient to be able to see when hooking up, it’s also convenient for the illumination not to be too bright.” Furthermore, various individuals are at varying degrees of comfort with being seen by others. Because of this, having the flexibility to adjust and decrease lighting enables us to experiment with seeing and being seen in ways that are both comfortable and sensual at the same time. A dimmer, indeed, but it may also refer to a variety of other sorts of lights and lamps that provide a more pleasant light.” — Jesse Kahn, a sex therapist and the head of The Gender & Sexuality Therapy Center in Los Angeles

Having the ability to decrease the lights may assist create a more intimate atmosphere, according to Kahn.

Having the ability to decrease the lights may assist create a more intimate atmosphere, according to Kahn.

5. The use of a television

“There is a great deal of disagreement on whether or not a television should be placed in the bedroom. Personally, I prefer watching television when completely reclined on pillows in front of the television set. The fact that I have a television in my room helps me to be transported away from the rest of the home, and it also allows me to watch television in the most comfortable manner possible, whether in isolation and serenity or with people and improved cuddling possibilities. It has also been historically beneficial for me to watch reruns of shows like ‘The Nanny’ or ‘Family Guy’ when I’ve needed a little extra aid falling asleep at night.” ― John F. Kennedy

A butt plug is number six.

“If you like anal play, you should always have a butt plug on hand. They are enjoyable to play with on their own, and they are also really useful for relaxing the bum before to penetrative anal play. The Rianne S Booty Plug 3-Pack is one of my favorites since it allows you to experiment with various sizes until you find one that works for you (again, this might change day to day). They feature a fantastic shape, with a tapered tip for simple insertion and a thin neck (the portion of the device that lies in the anal canal) for comfort and a powerful grip. And they’re nice because they bring a little glitter to your buttocks.” [Baldwin] [Baldwin] [Baldwin]

7. Cleaning wipes for the *inside of the thighs*

“Preparation is essential for having wonderful sex. My nightstand is stocked with these Promescent Before and After wipes, and they come in handy for freshening up before or after partner activity. What’s even better is that they are free of alcohol and hypoallergenic.” — Moali (Mali, Indonesia)

According to Moali, using wipes might help you freshen up before or after partner play.

8. Pillows that are firm

“Missionary-style sex is the most prevalent and, particularly for women, may be a little blah and uninteresting. A firm cushion beneath the buttocks aids in tilting the pelvis, which allows for more direct stimulation of the clitoris during penetration of the buttocks. Furthermore, it allows for a more comfortable angle during cunnilingus to be achieved. When it comes to clitoral stimulation, the angle is everything, although that is a joke. The time spent experimenting to find the best perspective for you is definitely worth it.” — Tom Murray, a sex therapy professional

a towel (number nine)

An additional item I usually have on hand is a towel or something to wipe up with.” While it is necessary to take a shower and thoroughly clean up after solo or partner activity, I would want to be able to choose between remaining where I am for a while and immediately entering the shower. “I have more possibilities with a towel.” — Susan Milstein, a sexuality educator and clinical assistant professor in the department of health and kinesiology at Texas A&M University’s College of Human Sciences

Decor that is influenced by sex

The fact that I work in the sexual education field means that I always keep at least one or two sexually relevant objects on display in my bedroom as home décor. A stunning glass dildo from Lovehoney, as well as a set of golden handcuffs from Unbound Babes, are now among my favorites.” — Eva Bloom, a sex education specialist

Essential oils are number 11 on the list.

A clear connection exists between the nose — and especially, the olfactory sense — and the limbic system, which is also associated with memory. As a result, odors may be a huge turn-on (and turn-off). Essential oils used to establish the scene for lovemaking assist individuals relax and let the stresses of the day to slip away, allowing the mind and body to concentrate on pleasure instead of tension. “My favorite scents are lavender and eucalyptus.” — Murray & McIntyre 

A notebook is number twelve.

“I like having a discourse with my lover (or partners) regarding the language that is used during sex. ” In this session, we may talk about the words and phrases we might use to express when we want to halt or stop, when we’re loving what’s occurring and want to promote more or continuing play, or when we want to check in on how the other is doing.

In part because I am a visual person, I sometimes keep notes on these discussions in my bedroom as a reminder — not necessarily to refer to them on a regular basis, but as a recall of the conversation itself so that I am cognizant of the contrasts and similarities in communication styles. Because it is a topic that has the ability to generate further information, feedback, ideas, or sentiments when new experiences are gained, it also acts as a starting point for any subsequent talks on the subject.” ― John F. Kennedy

Responses have been minimally edited for length and clarity, but are otherwise unaltered.